The people around you shape you

Just as flowers bloom only if they are planted in fertilised soil, we are similarly shaped by our environment. When our environment is toxic, our physical and mental health is affected. When our environment is supportive, we are more likely to thrive.

One of the main factors of the environment that envelops us are the people we associate with on a regular basis. As social beings, we are interdependent on those around us, and more often than not our relationships with others are what make our life a more beautiful one (and also more stressful depending on the types of relationships you have). On a daily basis, we come into contact with a range of people, in a range of contexts and situations. Some bring us happiness and provide us with loving support. Others bring us down and make us feel worthless.

I have no doubt that one of the main keys to success is the people we know. I don’t mean that in the sense that you get ahead by simply knowing all the people in power who make the decisions. I’m talking about having people in your life who inspire you to better yourself, and who support you in your endeavour to make yourself a better person. People whose hearts are big enough to be happy for your success, rather than whose egos are so big they want to compete with you for success. People who want to help you because they want to, not because they want something from you in return. People who see the potential in you, even when you can’t see it in yourself. These are the people who you should have on your team, and in your life.

So the practice this week is to cast your mind through the people who come in and out of your life on a regular basis. Are the majority of the people you know supportive or unsupportive? When you associate with those who aren’t supportive of you, what kind of person do you become? Do you become withdrawn, distrustful, bitter, pessimistic, unhappy? On the other hand, when you associate with those who are supportive, what kind of person do you become? Do you become open, lighter, happier, optimistic, motivated, stronger, braver?

Knowing this, make a conscious decision to associate more with those who make you happy being “you”, or who support you in being the “you” you want to be. If you have to associate with those who aren’t supportive, then simply accept them as they are, without seeking anything from them more than what they can provide to you. For each unsupportive person you have in your life, try to spend equivalent time with those who do support you to bring that balance to your life.

After all, each person has a seed in them to be the beautiful and incredible person they want to be. All they’re waiting for is that supportive soil to allow them to blossom in full bloom.

This article has been published as part of the Metta Legal Client Wellbeing Series. You can access that article here: http://www.mettalegal.com/staying-positive-in-separation-divorce/